Designated for Assignment

And unconditionally released

I have been in retirement, waiting to be offered a job as a color analyst. But now comes Harvard. Half of the 230 people who run its $35 billion endowment will be designated for assignment, dumped on the market. Each may be claimed by any lesser academy that can offer an annual salary of $4,400,000 (no joke; Harvard paid 11 money managers $242,000,000 in a recent five-year period). In subsequent seasons Harvard will emulate Yale (how great is this? rats following the Pied Piper, and if he isn't paid, he may toot for the football players) and "outsource" (oops, there will be placards in the Yard) its endowment investment decisions (presumably to get more involved with illiquid, Romneyesque private equity deals of indeterminable value). A thought has just come to me (or did it occur to me 23 years ago, so hard to remember): eliminate tuition, reduce student fees, kill million-dollar compensation packages, put a shrinking endowment entirely in government bonds (supporting lots of programs invented by faculty members), and fire the other half (115) of the endowment management staff. This advice is free, unlike that provided to Harvard by McKinsey & Co. (love to see that bill).